Jesus don't want me for a sunbeam

Kurt Cobain once wrote that "all we know is all we are"...I disagree. I am by no means a religious person, but sometimes we all need to seek out something to either aspire to, or in my case, listen to... something else other than the voices in ones own head. People that know me well realize by now that most of my religious knowledge and interests come from either cartoons or seriously skewed writings. However, within the last year, I have been hooked on the sermons given by the young and very charismatic evangelist Joel Osteen. I like the fact that each time I seem to be seeking reason or counsel on something specific, he's usually on that topic when I tune in to catch him. For instance, there was the time that I was having to deal with a lot of others' negativity and it was bringing me down, big time. It's no secret that I can't abide what I deem "toxic" people and I usually do my utmost to keep them at bay. Sometimes this isn't always possible, as most of the individuals closest to me have been in that position for so many years, that striking them out is not the reasonable thing to do. Instead, I try to talk with them, help them to see other points of view or in some cases, just tell a joke. In extreme cases, I'll just retreat to my own surroundings, listen to knowing music or read and chill. I know from personal experience that some of the worst karma from others can really affect you.
I have always tried to maintain a well balanced and disciplined mind. To stay hopeful and to think only good thoughts, even when it's killing me to do it. I must admit, I failed miserably at this in recent times and lost out in the process. I am trying now to get into faith. Today Joel spoke about what responsibilities we have unto ourselves. How your own personal happiness is up to you, not someone else. How we can't control every person or every situation, but that attitude is important and to enjoy every day, no matter the circumstance...that one definition of joy is calm delight...in other words, be at peace, no matter what. Easy to say, not always easy to do. He suggests that if you feel defeated and full of regret, you can either give into it and pretty much give all of your power away in the process or you can decide to stand guard over the doorway of your own mind and in doing so, achieve inner happiness. I used to hear people say, "don't give life to your fears by speaking them out" and usually dismissed it by saying "they're cracked! What is that, a cult saying?". But it's absolutely true! I'm not deluded enough to expect to be able to walk around all the time with a smile on my face or see the positive...we all know there is a lot of shit in this world to contend with and sometimes you don't have the energy...or maybe it's just because you don't want to look like a complete lunatic in doing so. All this to say, I do have to admit that seeing the lighter side of most situations is easier than seeking out the negative and walking round with a sour puss on.
Sermon'out.